What is the most idiotic Mormon teaching you know of?
Around 2,500 B.C. in the Book of Mormon narrative the Jaredites built submarines!  Thankfully back then Mormon Jesus, who wouldn't be born for another 2,500 years was at the helm guiding these windowless crafts across the ocean. 
In the Book of Mormon it specifically states that windows weren't allowed because they would be "dashed to pieces"... that shouldn't have mattered because window glass wouldn't be invented until nearly 3,000 years later in the 1700's...
That's pretty spectacular! Wooden vessels that were "tight like unto a dish", whatever that means, and they had air holes on the top and the bottom?  I guess gravity didn't exist back then?  Also, they had glowing rocks so they could see the bees and the Tapirs they were transporting during their journey.  
I guess back then they didn't really need, you know OXYGEN or fresh WATER.  Not to mention the human and animal excrement... OH! maybe that was what the bottom hole in the submarines was for? 
Just typing this out hurt my brain.
For behold, ye shall be as a whale in the midst of the sea; for the mountain waves shall dash upon you.
— Ether 2:24
And it came to pass that when they were buried in the deep there was no water that could hurt them, their vessels being tight like unto a dish.
— Ether 6:7
And thus they were driven forth; and no monster of the sea could break them, neither whale that could mar them; and they did have light continually, whether it was above the water or under the water.
— Ether 6:10
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